The Night of the Ladies Men
by Andamogirl
Summary: Jim, Artie and two lovely women. A glimpse into a slice of domestic life on board the Wanderer. No violence and that's a first for me. Enjoy.
1. Part One

**THE NIGHT OF THE LADIES MEN**

**By Andamogirl**

Author's note: tag to "The Night of the Vicious Valentine", season 2. References to the episode.

Story I wrote out of writer's block. One shot.

References to my stories "The Night of the Comanche Moon" and to "The Night of the Mexican Imposture".

_Emma Valentine__: On the basis of your answers, it would seem that your ideal mate is a combination of Aphrodite, Helen of Troy, and Lola Montez. Oh, Mr. West, I'm afraid it can't be done.  
__Jim__: Oh, Frankly I like to do my own shopping anyway.  
__Emma Valentine__: And you adore shopping, don't you, Mr. West? Because all those fluffy-headed little girls thrill to the touch of you._

_Emma Valentine: Mr. West, what do you notice first in a woman?_

_Jim: Her lips, her eyes, her hair. Her figure. But not necessarily in that order._

_Emma Valentine__**:**__ You. You, Mr. West. You're not gaudy or shrill. You're just too, too wonderfully compelling. You're a quiet, terribly attractive young man whose game is, uh, life... and death._

_Emma Valentine__: What do you demand of a woman: intelligence or beauty?  
__Jim__: Beauty if they're intelligent. Intelligence if they're beautiful. _

_Emma Valentine: Which do you prefer? Blondes, brunettes, or redheads?_

_Jim: Yes. All three._

Warning: morning cuddles, kissing and biting. Nudity, skinny-dipping and implied intercourse but nothing graphic and mouth-watering breakfasts too.

WWW

**PART ONE**

_Kansas City_

_The Wanderer, at night_

Rolling his eyes, James West said, "You incorrigible chocolate-lover!" And, smiling, amused, he watched his best friend Artemus Gordon lower the red heart-shaped box of chocolate cherries pieces onto the table – and then carefully lick one other sticky chocolate-coated finger with delicate, catlike sweeps of his tongue, closing his eyes and savoring the taste.

Artie grinned and replied, "I can't waste all that chocolate. Impossible! It's too good," and then he headed toward the galley.

Once there, the older man moved toward the sink and he rapidly washed his hands which he wiped on a plaid cloth a few seconds later.

He opened the doors of the upper part of the sideboard and then pulled out two metallic mugs from the middle shelf. "I love weddings. There's always a big creamy cake, good food, lots of bottles of liquor and wine, sometimes bottles of Champagne and… always lovely single pretty ladies…" and he winked at Jim. He settled the two big cups on the table and then closed the top compartment. He added, "The wedding is tomorrow afternoon, at the St Mark's church. We'll be there to see Mrs. Michele LeMaster and Mr. Paul Lambert exchange their wedding vows… if of course, we don't have any new assignment in the next few hours. This break will be a good thing, it will grant us some rest and recreation we both deserve. Our last mission was pretty tough." He ran his hand over his neck. "I was almost beheaded by a paper-cutting machine, and I fell several feet at the end of a metal wire hanging above the chapel... "And he rotated his painful shoulders, one after the other. "I almost dislocated my arms by doing that stunt."

Jim who had followed his best friend inside the small room took the pot of coffee warming on the stove and poured the black, steaming liquid into the two mugs. "Says the old man!" he said, with a mocking look. "And you forgot to mention you were knocked out." He sighed and said, "Spending the afternoon and night at the wedding party will be very nice, but I wouldn't mind a few days of rest. We had three long and very strenuous missions before this one…"

Interrupting Jim Artie snorted. "You can add stressful, grueling and deadly to the list."

Nodding, Jim said, "You're right." He reached out, offering a coffee-filled mug to his partner. "I'm going to wire to Richmond for a short leave."

Grabbing the enameled tinplate mug, Artie shook his head. "Not a short leave, a long one, like two whole weeks. I'd love spending a leave near the sea and spend my days sleeping, reading, drawing, cooking, swimming, fishing, taking long walks on a fine sandy beach and enjoy the silence, and not necessarily in that order." Then, smiling, he took a sip of coffee. "Ow!"

He grimaced in pain as he burnt his tongue. It was very hot!

Sitting on a stool next to the small table, Jim nodded. "Silence? At the seaside? What do you make of the sound of the breaking waves and the cries of the seagulls?"

Artie opened the top part of the sideboard again to take down a glass container in which fresh hazelnut and chocolate chips cookies were piled up. "I mean no human voices and no noises… other than ours." Then he pulled off the lid of the cookie jar and fished one out of it. "What do you think?" Then he sat the big glass container in the middle of the table.

Taking a cookie from the jar too, Jim replied, "That's a good idea, Artie. We almost never take seaside leaves, and almost never take leaves, full stop. I think Colonel Richmond will accept it if he needs his two best agents to be in top form." He took a bite of the cookie prepared with chocolate dough which was crisp and soft at the same time and Mmmed in pleasure. Then he swallowed a mouthful of hot coffee and asked, "Have I ever told you that this cookie is one of your best inventions?"

Smiling, Artie nodded. "A hundred times, yes."

Jim continued, "Do you have a specific place to go in mind?"

Taking his place at the table in front of the younger man, on the second stool, Artemus replied, "I personally prefer to swim in water that's not too cold because of my 'old' bones'…" with an emphasis on 'old'. "We could go somewhere in the Gulf of Mexico which is full of many small secluded bays and coves… and be alone far away from the world there. Do you remember that village in Texas called Santa Ana located near the border where Diego Rodrigues and his banditos hid for weeks? Before we found them? The coast was absolutely heavenly."

Grinning Jim nodded and said, "I only remember the lovely señoritas of the cantina who welcomed us with open arms… " Then he took another sip of coffee.

Rolling his eyes, Artie tsked-tsked. "You, James my boy, you! Not me. I remember they were attracted by you, all of them… and not by me – at all. I felt very lonely all of a sudden." And he pouted playfully. After a few seconds he chuckled softly and then took a bite from his cookie which had more hazelnut than chocolate chips, he noticed. He said, 'I'll make gooseberry and blueberry muffins next time, and after that a gâteau Basque filled with black cherry jam."

Jim nodded. "Anything you want. I love everything you do."

Eating his cookie Artie started to muse.

Jim was a woman's man, the epitome of male irresistible magnetic power over the fair sex. Everywhere he went, he had women practically throwing themselves in his arms – and then in his bed. He was less successful with women, he knew it and didn't care about it. He was older than Jim, less well built than him, didn't have a 'predator presence' like him, some 'manly primitive attractiveness' that women loved like his wolfish smile. But he wasn't jealous, never had been, never would be as he didn't know what it was like.

He moved on, "The Mayor of Santa Ana, Carlos Ribera was so happy we got rid of the banditos who terrorized the population that he offered to welcome us to his village the next time we passed by. I think it's the perfect place to rest. I'm sure he'll find us a house near the beach…" He said.

Jim grinned. "It's a very good idea. We can go to the cantina from time to time to see the señoritas and propose that they visit us during the day, at night, both..."

Shaking his head, Artemus said, "Visit you, you mean? So much for the silence! Send a message to Washington. Ask the Colonel for a two week-long leave because we both need it. Explain to him why." He stood, stretched and yawned. "If you need me I'll be in my lab, I need to work on my new explosive device." He fished one cookie from the glass jar and then placed it under his arm. "See you later, Jim," and then he headed toward the side door opening into the narrow walkway.

Frowning in frustration Jim crossed his arms over his chest, a pout on his face. "Artie, you are taking the cookie jar with you, I'd like to eat some more," he said, voice tinged with amusement.

Nibbling the cookie with a grin plastered on his face, Artemus nodded. "I know that, but I need sugar to run my brain," he said, with a twinkle in his eye and he left the galley.

WWW

_The next morning_

Marmalade was sleeping on the couch, in the sunlight, spread all along a golden cushion when Jim, freshly showered, clean shaven, his hair combed and dressed in his favorite powder blue suit entered the parlor room, finding it Artie-less.

But the smell of food being cooked and the tantalizing smell of coffee - And the sound of a baritone voice humming a song - told him he would find his partner in the galley.

He petted the fluffy cat for a few seconds – waking the slumbering feline which flicked its tail in annoyance - and then he walked up to the mini kitchen.

Marmie leaped down to the carpeted floor, stretched and followed Jim into the galley.

Jim discovered his best friend standing in front of the stove, preparing scrambled eggs with sliced bacon sizzling in a large frying pan. Artie was barefoot, bare-chested, just wearing his pajama pants and had a flowery apron protecting his front from splatters.

Marmalade leaped on one of the stools and sat there finding nothing interesting for her on the table. Then she rolled into a ball, yawned and closed her eyes.

He heard and felt his stomach growl in hunger, and rubbing it, he whispered to his belly "Soon," then he said, "Hi Artie! Mmm… that smells good." He padded toward the wood-burning stove in front of which Artemus was standing. Once at his best friend's side he added, "I'm hungry, what else have you prepared that's good? I'm famished."

Lifting up his wooden spatula, Artie replied, "I made lots of toast, a pile of pancakes we can eat with all kinds of jam, honey and butter, I prepared a pot of coffee and I bottled orange juice, and, Iater in the morning I'll prepare just a potato omelet, a salad with crispy onions and baked and caramelized apples for lunch." He waved a stern finger and raised an eyebrow in warning. "And don't put crumbs on the floor, Jim, I swept it! When breakfast is over, I'll do a thorough clean here. It needs it!"

In playful mood Jim said, "You love cooking breakfast, making coffee, you love cleaning and you're wearing an apron… anyone ever tell you that you'd making a good wife Artie?"

His eyes twinkling with amusement Artemus smiled and replied, "You're the first, Jim and I take that as a compliment." He paused to chuckle and then added, "We have to eat light because we'll be eating a lot this afternoon after the wedding ceremony. I can't wait to taste the wedding cake. I hope there will be a lot of butter cream and whipped cream too!"

Opening the right drawer of the lower part of the sideboard, Jim said, "Fortunately, we do a lot of exercise or we'd both be fat between your rich food and what we eat in saloons and restaurants." Then he pulled two forks, two little spoons and two knives from it.

Shaking his head, Artie placed his hand on his chest and corrected, "I'd be fat, not you. You're always hungry, eat a lot and never put on any weight! That's not fair compared to those who struggle not to gain weight like me for example, otherwise I'll be flunked from active duty and put behind a desk. And for someone like me who likes to cook and eat good things, it's very difficult."

Jim nodded. "I'm a growing boy."

Filling two plates with the soft scrambled eggs and crispy sliced bacon, Artemus said, "Not exactly, you are a grown man with a growing boy's appetite. You're like a stomach on legs, Jim." Then he put some salt and pepper on the dishes. "I could stop making rich food y'know? I could make a lighter cuisine, based on soup, quiches, salad, simple omelets, ham, cottage cheese... You'd have good food to eat and so would I, but I wouldn't have to fight weight gain every minute of the day." He removed his apron, folded it and put it on the worktop. Then he added, "Fried chicken and mashed potatoes, it's very good and light…"

Jim nodded and said, "You could do it, yes, but you couldn't resist rich food for long." He pulled out two cups from the top part of the double-fronted sideboard. "You're a gourmet. A simple omelet, it's not for you. You have to add roasted potatoes, caramelized onions, grilled bacon, fresh herbs…"

Placing the still very hot frying pan in the sink Artie chuckled and replied, "That's true. I am therefore condemned to pay attention to my weight and to exercise so as not to get fat - and watching you eat like four people without gaining weight."

Shaking his head, Jim replied, "Life is sometimes unfair." He sat on the feline-free stool while Artemus bent over to scoop up his cat.

The older man lowered Marmalade to the floor. "Stay here, Marmie," he commanded. "I need to sit down to have breakfast," he added scratching the cat's head.

But Marmie like other cats didn't follow orders and she flicked her tail disapprovingly. She jumped up on her owner's lap and curled into a ball there, where she intended to continue her nap.

Searching his brain how to dissuade the orangey long-haired feline to go elsewhere, Artie looked down at his cat and said. "I'm gonna have to get up, you know? You'd be better off in your basket."

Marmalade meowed a firm 'no' and then she rubbed her face against her owner's belly, mewling, trying to soften him up to let her stay in her comfortable spot.

Artie smiled as his cat's nose and whiskers brushed against his navel. "It won't work," he said.

Marmie ignored that. She moved into a sitting position and stretched her neck out as she sniffed delicately at the edge of Artemus's plate.

Then, not interested she began licking a paw, cleaning it thoroughly.

Not minding his cat Artemus cut a slice of fried bacon on his plate and said, "I'm very happy that Richmond has granted us a two-week leave, starting today. We'll head to Texas tomorrow morning and in three days we'll be sleeping in the little house I rented early this morning near the village of Santa Ana. I sent a message to the Mayor and he found us a fisherman's house near a beautiful beach, with a pontoon where a small boat is docked. I know how to sail so we can go offshore and then I can catch bigger fish."

Nodding, Jim planted his fork in a piece of omelet. "And if we need lovely ladies to share our picnics on the beach we could invite the cantina women to join us."

Artemus picked up Marmalade from his lap, placed her over his shoulder – a spot she loved to be - before she could meow in annoyance and stood. Then he grabbed a dishcloth and using it took the very hot pot of newly brewed coffee from the stove.

Marmie perched on his shoulder, purring in pleasure, Artemus poured the black, steaming liquid into the golden cups already sitting on the table and then said, "And of course they'll accept and they will be wrapped around you… and me, I'll be all alone."

Jim shook his head and said, "Not quite actually. A woman was interested in you in that cantina. She was behind the bar. Do you remember her?"

Searching in his prodigious photographic memory within seconds, Artie wrinkled his brow and said, "No, I don't… Are you sure? What did she look like?"

Taking his cup of coffee Jim chuckled softly and asked, "Do you remember what you looked like when you were disguised as that old cantina lady?" He saw Artie nod, took a sip and then added, "She looked like that. She was cleaning the glasses with a cloth and she was staring at you – devouring you with her eyes. See? Someone was attracted by you buddy." Then he grinned mockingly.

Sending Jim a black look, his eyebrows knitting, Artie wasn't amused. "Hahaha, very funny.," he drawled. "You just invented her. It was a man behind the bar, not a woman. I have an unfailing memory."

Marmalade hopped down to the table, then to the floor and then she trotted off toward her basket settled not far from the stove.

She curled up into a ball in it, on a plushy cushion and started purring loudly, her tail swaying lazily as she basked in the gentle warmth.

Reaching out across the table, Jim patted Artie's shoulder – covered with cat's hairs – soothingly. "Yes, it was. I lied, but it was to comfort you," he said. Then he smiled teasingly.

Not cross, Artie stood and a few seconds later come back with the tray containing the toasted slices of bread and pancakes, plus the jars of jam and honey and the butter dish which he had previously placed on the worktop, under a dishcloth to keep them cool. "It's very kind of you, Jim," he said, lowering the next part of the breakfast to the small table. "But I don't mind, you know. I don't mind that you're the only one these young women find to their liking." He shoved the dishcloth across his shoulder and then started buttering a slice of toast. "And I usually have no problem attracting women."

Uncorking the bottle of honey, Jim thought, 'of course Artie didn't have problems attracting women as he was a Lady's man. His sweet manners and warm smile, his baritone voice, his erudition and gentle good humor – his overall adorableness - helped him charm his own fair share of the many women they met on assignments or not. Thankfully there was no romantic rivalry between them as they mostly had double dates – and even when a single woman was involved an ended up in his arms, Artie didn't mind. He didn't know what jealousy was.

Pouring honey on a stack of steaming, perfect golden brown pancakes standing on his plate, the luscious scents rising from them making his mouth water, Jim suggested, "I know, Artie, but maybe they don't like men with brown eyes, but green ones…" Then he took his knife and fork and smiled.

It was meant as a joke, but Artemus shifted into scientific mode and said, "You're right Jim. I read somewhere in a scientific journal that physical attraction - which implies sexual attractiveness or desirability - between a male and a female depends on many factors like physical appearance and attractiveness, or other qualities or traits of a person like his or her voice, their movements, their manners and intelligence and honesty, and their charm and smell, their clothing, perfume or good health, etc. So those women in the cantina Jim, loved your characteristics and not mine. It's simple." He smeared a thick layer of strawberry jam on his crispy slice of buttered bread and then said, "I hope to meet someone at the wedding ceremony or after, at the party – who will be attracted by my own characteristics."

Furrowing his brow, Jim sent his best friend a long look. "You just killed romance."

Artie replied, "You know, romance is love based on emotional attachment…" And he grinned when Jim glowered at him. "Romance or not, James my boy, I'm sure you will spread your charms around before the party and after the party and, as usual, you will end up at the end of the day with a dozen of women ready to jump into bed with you." Then he bit into his toast.

Jim, overly-confident, winked at his best friend. "Oh, I'm sure of that too, Artie, and the choice will again be very difficult to make," a blonde, a brunette, or a redhead?" he said. Then he took a bite of pancake trying not to moan as the piece of thick, fluffy, honeyed crepe dissolved on his tongue – but just couldn't. "Mmmm…"

Smiling Artemus said, "I'm glad you like my pancakes." He took a sip of hot coffee and then added, "Next time I'll put some chocolate chips inside the batter," and he chuckled as Jim nodded enthusiastically.

"Could you make waffles with chocolate chips too and put some whipped cream on top?" He asked flashing Artie a broad, hopeful grin.

Artie rolled his eyes. "Sometimes you're worse than a child," he said.

Suddenly there was a long, demanding meow and the two men lowered their eyes to the floor watching Marmie sitting on her haunches on the floor, between them.

The cat looked up at its owner and, waving its fluffy tail signaling that it was hungry.

Petting Marmie's head between her pointy ears, Artie said to Marmalade, "I'm going to open a can of sardines in oil just for you, I know you love it, and I also cooked some vegetables for you that I mixed with a little rice." And the cat started loud and low purrs of pleasure.

Jim downed a glass of orange juice and then said, "You spoil Marmalade too much. I'm no longer surprised that she doesn't want to eat the mice in the stable car anymore."

Lowering the tawny cat to the floor Artie replied, "She plays with them and then kills them, that's good enough for me. Besides cats are gourmets."

Jim took a sip of coffee. "Not all cats, only those who are used to eating good food like their gourmets owners, right Artie?"

WWW

_In the afternoon_

_At the wedding party_

_Lambert's mansion, in the garden_

Sitting alone under a venerable oak tree, protected from the blinding sun and from heat of the day, Artemus plunged his little silver spoon into the piece of wedding cake covered with double icing, first with almond icing and then with a very pure white frosting.

Hearing a laugh he knew well he pivoted on his chair and, to his right, saw Jim talking with a petite brunette with long curly hair and wearing a blue dress and a white feathered hat.

They were sitting at a table settled next to a rose bush, isolated from the other guests, and they obviously were attracted to each other, as they were holding hands and were close enough to kiss each other…

He smiled, knowing what would happen next. It shouldn't be long now, he thought… and just at that second Jim offered his conquest his irresistible and charming smile, and cupped the young woman's cheek with one hand, rubbing a thumb over her cheekbone.

Their lips met in a gentle, sweet kiss.

Smiling, Artemus turned around and put the piece of sponge and kirschwasser-soaked cherry cake in his mouth and let it melt there for a few seconds, enjoying each second of it. it was delicious! He moaned in pleasure and closed his eyes in bliss.

He froze when he heard a soft mocking chuckle.

He turned around and saw a blonde woman move toward him, slowly swaying her hips. She was dressed in a red dress with black lace and a plunging décolleté and she was wearing a red-feathered hat. She was petite, young and held a glass of Champagne in her red-gloved hand.

Artie blushed faintly in embarrassment and stood "It's so very good, nobody can resist it," he said in his defense. He straightened his cravat, and brushed a quick hand through his glossy hair. "Hello." Then he smiled and lightly bowed his head. "My name is Artemus Gordon…" His heart made a jump in his chest. She was absolutely gorgeous! No, she was Divine! She looked like a Greek goddess! She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever laid eyes on… yet, he thought.

Moving closer the blonde woman looked up and down and back at the dark-haired man who was standing in front of her wearing a nice full swallowtail tuxedo, with a white silk shirt with frills, a golden satin vest and tie. His shiny boots were black too. He was broad-shouldered and well-built.

Her breath caught and her heart sped up.

He was even more devastatingly handsome up close. He had gentle chocolate eyes, soft curly hair, high cheekbones, a strong jaw and a warm smile.

She said, "I know who you are. Michele told me everything about you, Mr. Gordon and about your partner, Mr. West, and what you did, and do. Michele is my best friend." She moved even closer and stopped at the border of Artie's personal space. "My name is Gabriella Salvini."

Moving an empty chair backward with courtesy, so that the lovely woman could sit on it, Artie in full seduction mode said, "Please, have a seat, Miss Salvini. I see you're from Italy. You have such a lovely accent," he added with flirtatious smile on his face.

Miss Salvini blushed in pleasure and took her place on the chair. "I came to the US when I was fifteen, and my accent stayed. I worked with Michele in Washington. I was a barmaid too and a showgirl to make a little more money. We're friends, so she invited me to her wedding," she introduced herself. Then she added, "I'm so happy for Michele! For Paul and Michele! They love each other so much! They are so happy! I must admit I'm a bit jealous, I hope one day I'll meet a wonderful man too…" Then she took a long sip of Champagne, looking Artie right in the eye, blinking seductively.

Politely smiling, Artie said, his voice smooth and calm, "I hope you will meet the man who is destined for you, Miss Salvini..." on a tone which implied, 'it's not me'. "And this man will be the happiest of men to have you as his wife, by his side." Then noticing that the blonde woman's glass was almost empty he gestured to a waiter walking through the crowd gathered a little further away near the gargantuan buffet.

Gabriella heard that loud and clear. She didn't insist and moved on.

She placed her hand on Artie's and whispered, "I'm not a reserved person, I usually get to the point. I find you handsome Mr. Gordon, and I had a hard time keeping my eyes off you during the wedding ceremony and after…" She leaned up close to Artemus's face, her fingers traced his jaw line and added in a low voice. "I've wanted to ask you something for hours… Would you like to kiss me?"

Artie smiled broadly from ear to ear and almost chuckled.

He loved women who worked in bars and saloons because they didn't care about respecting a woman's reserved behavior and strict morality of society as they were not afraid of anything and for that, they dared to do anything. Gabriella was no exception, he mused.

Stopping beside Artemus the waiter took two glasses of Champagne from his tray and placed them on the table before leaving silently, heading back toward the numerous guests.

Artemus and Gabriella didn't even notice him.

Smiling at the blonde woman, Artie said, "With great pleasure," and he leaned toward her, so close that there was no space in between them. He gently, cupped her chin, turned Gabriella's head slightly, and bent his own so that their lips met in a chaste and tender kiss.

Their tongues brushed but Gabriella wanted much more, a lot more.

Butterflies bursting in her stomach, she placed her empty glass on the table and then tangled her fingers in Artie's thick and lustrous black hair (loving the scent of his perfumed hair-grooming product, by the way) with one hand and grabbed the front of Artemus's shirt with the other.

She kissed Artie back - in a demanding way, with a fiery sucking kiss and then, with a gentle caress of his tongue Artemus asked her for permission and she opened her mouth. She sighed contentedly into his mouth when their tongues met and danced, slowly, languidly, together.

Finally they broke apart, Gabriella nibbling Artie's lower lip as she pulled back. "Mmm… That feels good. More!" She said, her eyes shimmering with happiness.

Artemus obliged very willingly, kissing Gabriella again, this time full and deep, fingers kneading the back of her delicate neck, inhaling her flowery perfume again, loving it.

They continued kissing and touching each other for some time, until Gabriella - her entire body beginning to hum with desire proposed, "Maybe we could get to know each other better somewhere else?" with a suggestive spark in her eye. And under the table, she began stroking Artie's leg lazily up and down until her hand stopped on his inner thigh and she felt him twitch – letting him know what she wanted.

Panting from the wild kiss which had left him breathless, Artie said. "I happen to know a perfect place for that." He started brushing the tips of his fingers though Gabriella's long and light shiny hair. "It's the Wanderer. It's a beautiful train."

Needless to say, Gabriella was quite surprised then her green eyes sparkled up with curiosity "You have a train?" she asked.

Smiling Artie nodded. "Yes, and a nice bed in my compartment, but it's small though. We're going to be a bit cramped… But if you want a larger bed I can rent a hotel room…"

Gabriella shook her head. "No, I want to be squeezed against you, and more…" she purred, rubbing the tips of their noses together.

WWW

Holding the adorable Nora's white satin gloved hand in his, his fingers intertwined with hers, Jim used his free hand to gently trace the young woman's lips painted in deep rose which were contrasting with its delicate creamy skin with a dusting of freckles across her nose. "You're so beautiful Nora..." Then he leaned toward her, gently lifted her chin with a fingertip and said, "You have such pretty lips… so tantalizing… I'm going to kiss you now, if of course you allow me to do so."

Nora felt the heat rush up her neck and settling across her cheeks which she felt turn red. "Yes, please," she breathed. Then, her heart pounding from anticipation, she melted under Jim's lips as he pulled her close in his strong arms and kissed her softly.

She reached up to lock her arms around his neck as their kiss grew more intense and then she moaned as goosebumps raced across her skin.

Nora pulled away with a breathless gasp and let out a long sigh as she pressed her face into the crook of the neck of the man in the black tuxedo, with beautiful green eyes and could smell his expensive eau de Cologne, loving it. "I've never met a man like you before, Jim, so handsome and strong. You're perfect."

Smiling in pleasure, Jim kissed the top of Nora's head. "You are a very beautiful woman, Nora. I've never seen almond violet eyes like yours before… They're unique, like you."

His breath has been taken away yet again by her angelic beauty when he had seen her in the church, and she too had been attracted to him there, not being able to take her eyes off him for a second. They had met later in the garden of Lambert's mansion and stayed together, flirting with each other, he remembered.

Glancing above Nora's shoulder he spotted Artie and a mysterious blonde woman, with curves in all the right places, pressed together leave the wedding party.

He recognized her. Gabriella Salvini. Michele had introduced her to him after the wedding ceremony. She was one of her friends from Washington. She had said hello, and briefly looked at him with a polite smile – focused on another man, Artemus.

It hadn't escaped Michele who had whispered to him, when Gabriella was gone, that her friend was in the habit of picking up handsome men preferably the tall and muscular kind in the bar where she worked, enjoying one-night lovemaking – he thought.

He smiled happily. Artemus wouldn't be alone that afternoon… and the coming night, he thought. And he took a sip of Champagne. Good ol' Artie! Someone hadn't resisted his physical attraction.

But as he didn't want to 'disturb' them, he would have to avoid having intercourse with Nora in his sleeping compartment, but fortunately Artie's lab had a nice and comfy bed on which his best friend slept when he was too exhausted to go to his compartment after hours and hours of research and experimentations on bunches of new gadgets... he added in his mind.

He looked at Nora and said, "Maybe we could leave… I'd like to show you my best friend's laboratory. It's a fantastic place," he said with gentle smile.

Nora raised an eyebrow and gave Jim a confused look.. "A laboratory?"

Smiling, Jim leaned down to kiss the brunette on the forehead. "Yes, a laboratory, and there's a bed there," he replied.

Nora's heart skipped a beat and she blushed, shivers running down her spine.

She didn't say no.

Tbc.


	2. Part Two

**THE NIGHT OF THE LADIES MEN**

**By Andamogirl**

WWW

**PART TWO**

_Much later, in the evening_

_In Artemus's lab_

Nora woke up first, spooned against a very naked Jim, their bodies molded together underneath the top sheet and bedspread and she grinned ecstatically while basking in her lover's warmth, feeling all his well-defined muscles against her body. "Mmm… it's so nice. It had been a long time since I woke up in a man's bed," she murmured and heaved a long contented sigh.

Smiling, she nibbled Jim's ear playfully in order to wake him – and he stirred slightly and then his eyes fluttered open.

She placed a kiss right underneath his ear. "Jim?"

Sighing, Jim rolled over onto his side so that he was face to face with Nora and then he whispered, "Good morning," very quietly against her soft lips, his voice tinged with sleep.

Nora started sucking on Jim's lips. "Good morning. Mmm… Thanks for the perfect night, I mean the perfect afternoon" she purred, giving him a smile, and then she grazed her teeth against the rough skin of her lover's jawline and felt Jim groan deep in his throat. "I'm sure tonight will be just as perfect, James. I'd love to stay like this, in your arms, forever, it's so good… but in a larger bed, preferably."

Jim reached over and gently stroked the silken skin of the brunette's cheek and she kissed his fingers. "You could be sick tomorrow, stay here, with me," he proposed as he reached out a hand to brush aside the strands of dark hair draped over her face.

Nora shook her head. "Impossible. I can't, I've got to keep my job and Mr. Lambert counts of me to run all his current affairs."

Kissing Nora's temple, softly, Jim said, "Then our departure won't be delayed, unless the young woman Artemus brought here wants to stay longer, I don't know."

Nora curled her fingers into Jim disheveled hair. "New mission?"

Pulling the nude Nora closer – if possible – Jim ran his hands all over Nora's petite body, making her quiver wherever they touched.

He finally responded, "No, it's not a new mission. We have a well-deserved two-week leave. We're going to spend it in the little house that Artemus rented near the village of Santa Ana. It is located near the border, on the Gulf of Mexico."

Nora stretched languidly. "I envy you. I've never left Kansas City. I would love to travel, visit big cities like New York, Chicago..." Then she frowned, upset, as she needed to go to the bathroom – it was sudden an urgent - realizing that she would need to get out of bed. "I need to go to the bathroom…"

Pressing a kiss to Nora's forehead Jim said, "What about taking a bath together then? The bathtub is big enough for two." He yawned and scratched at his scalp.

Nora smiled. "Excellent idea."

Smiling back Jim pushed the bedspread and the top sheet down to the foot of the bed, he sat up on the mattress and then he stood.

He found his clothes thrown haphazardly around the room, mixed with Nora's.

Nora watched Jim pick up his underwear and socks and asked, "Do you have pajamas for me? I never tried to wear them."

He smiled. "With pleasure."

Nora threw her arms around Jim's neck, she pushed up onto her toes, and nibbled Jim's dimple. "I love a bath with bubbles," she said.

Smiling, Jim. dropped a kiss into Nora's sleep-mussed hair "The water will be covered with bubbles, lots of them," he said.

WWW

_Later_

_In Artemus's sleeping compartment_

Gabriella woke up peacefully with Artemus pinning her petite frame to the mattress under his weight and snoring softly into her left shoulder.

She grazed her teeth on his broad shoulder, threatening to add another bite mark to the ones which were marking his body, here and there.

Smiling, the young woman carefully untangled herself from the sleeping man, careful not to wake him up and slid out of bed.

She caressed Artemus's slumbering face, then she pressed a kiss to his nose. Artie moaned in his sleep, his long lashes fluttering in his near-waking.

She didn't want to wake him – but she couldn't resist the temptation. She sat on the edge of the bed and then she gently nipped at her lover's bottom lip.

His bleary eyes fluttering open, Artie shifted, groaned and murmured," Hey, mornin'…" his voice groggy and thick from sleep while rubbing a hand across his face.

Gabriella smiled, clearly amused by Artemus's greeting. She stroked his temple, gently and whispered back, "Good evening. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep, Artemus;" and she watched him close his half-lidded eyes, burying his face into the pillow, drifting back off to sleep.

She gave a soft peck to his lips, placed her feet on the carpeted floor as she stood up from the narrow but comfortable bed.

Then she turned around and looked down at the dark-haired man, who was lying on his stomach, the wrinkled bedspread covering his middle. "So handsome…" She whispered. She traced the outlines of the black eagle tattooed in his lower back, just above the waistline, fascinated. It was a Comanche tattoo he had told her, and that's all.

She had asked for more details, but he had told he couldn't tell her anything. That ceremony was sacred – it was a religious ritual.

Heaving a heavy sigh in his sleep, Artemus flipped onto his back, splaying across the mattress.

She couldn't resist running her hands gently over Artie's belly. It wasn't toned but he wasn't fat either. It was soft and warm. "Mmm… I found my next pillow," she said before leaving nips and open-mouthed kisses all around his navel.

She let out a long, dreamy sigh. "I'm so going to miss you," she whispered her voice full of regrets. She let out a heavy sigh. "But C'est la vie!'

They had made love the whole afternoon – and it was absolutely fantastic! Fa-bu-lous! – it had been the best intercourse she's ever had! She had loved every minute of it. - and they had fallen asleep at twilight, sated and content, she thought.

Smiling, she traced circles around Artie's navel thinking about extending their one afternoon-stand from, well, one night.

He'd accept of course.

She found Artie's green smoking jacket hanging behind the door, wrapped her naked body in it and left the sleeping compartment and once in the narrow walkway, she headed toward the galley.

She was hungry! And Artemus would be too. She was going to make them some dinner! Something simple. Omelets and toast, she mused.

WWW

_Later in the galley_

Gabriella found James West standing in the galley holding a pot of coffee. He was dressed in a white unbuttoned shirt and black pants. He was barefoot she noticed too. There was a brunette woman only dressed in stripped pajamas standing at his side.

They both had wet hair and she deduced that they had just come out of the bathroom. Perfect! She was dreaming of a bath... with Artie in it. Having sex in a bathtub with a handsome man was one of her wildest dreams... This one would soon be realized, she thought.

She rapidly combed her disheveled hair with her fingers, to be more presentable and then she said, "Good evening Mr. West!"

Seeing the blonde wearing Artie's smoking jacket that reached her knees and nothing else, Jim smiled and replied. "Good evening Miss Salivini. That smoking jacket looks much better on you than on Artemus," all the while getting quite an eyeful of the barely dressed young woman.

Nora moved toward Gabriella and offered her hand to the other woman. "Hi! My name's Nora, it's a pleasure to meet you."

Gabriella smiled and shook the brunette's hand. "Nice to meet you too, Nora. I saw you at the wedding ceremony right?"

Nora nodded. "Yes, I'm Mr. Lambert's personal secretary."

There was a long awkward silence as the two women looked at each other, realizing they had made love to their partners at the same time.

Gabriella stretched and grinned. "Artemus made love to me four times! Poor thing, he's still sleeping, he's exhausted."

Clearing his throat, Jim said, "I'll get you a cup of coffee Gabriella." Then he took the mug placed on the small table.

Gabriella shook her head. "Thanks, but later. I have to prepare dinner… I'm sure we are all hungry. And I love cooking."

Smiling, Jim shook his head. "You're not going to do anything here, Miss Salvini. It's Artie's den. He never lets anyone do anything here. He just grants me authorization to make coffee – that's all. But I help him to prepare food though, when he needs my help."

Suddenly the door opened and Artemus only dressed in pajamas pants, barefooted, shuffled in, still half asleep and rubbing one eye. He had pillow lines against his cheek too and parts of his curls were flattened on the left side of his head.

Gabriella found that just adorable. "Aww," she whispered, grinning.

Artemus saw Gabriella, Jim's date and his best friend grouped together and said gruffly, "Don't drink Jim's awful coffee Gabriella, it's going to make you sick or dead," and he kissed her on her lips. Then he took Nora's hand in his, air-kissed it gallantly, offered her a charming smile and introduced himself. "My name's Artemus Gordon, I'm Jim's best friend and partner. It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss…"

Her cheeks rosy, Nora briefly bit her lower lip, delighted at the sight of the other man's broad shoulders and strong torso – covered with red hickeys and bite marks. "Nora, Nora Whitaker… It's a pleasure to meet you too, Mr. Gordon…" She said, and she visibly flinched when she met Gabriella's eyes, dark with jealousy and she bit her lips nervously as she imagined the blonde ready to hiss at her like an angry cat.

Gabriella closed her arms around Artie's waist, in a possessive gesture, and head tilted up slightly, she kissed him back. "I need to take a long, looong bath," she said, tracing the older man's lips with a fingertip. Then she smoothed her hands across his lightly hairy chest. "But I don't remember where the bathroom is… You showed me this lavish train of yours, but there are so many doors everywhere..." She whispered, nuzzling his neck, placing tiny little kisses there between each word. She nibbled his strong hairy chin and then added, "Would you be kind enough to wash my back and hair? Then it will be my turn..."

Leaning down, Artie felt delightful shivers run up and down his spine and he kissed the top of Gabriella's messy hair. "With great pleasure," he responded, feeling his energy coming back.

In playful mood Jim said, "I can show you where the bathroom is, Gabriella," then as expected Artie sent him a black glare and he chose to ignore Nora's. But there was a sparkle of interest in Gabriella's eyes which did not escape him. Gabriella the man-eater! He thought. "But Artemus here knows where the bathroom is too." Then he chuckled softly. "I was just kidding," he specified.

Holding the young woman's hand, Artie left the galley and Gabriella followed him outside, her free fingers roaming across Artemus's bare back.

A light smirk on his face, Jim threw out, "What about dinner? Who's gonna make it?" in a tease, flashing an impish grin in Artie's direction.

Nora lifted her hand. "I can. I'm an excellent cook."

WWW

_The next morning_

_In Artie's lab_

Lying on top of Jim, her hands wandering over his muscular chest, Nora sucked, licked, and nibbled on her lover's jawline, softly grazing the hair on it.

Eyes closed, still half-asleep, Jim was moaning softly, his hands lazily sliding up and down Nora's spine in random circles, making her toes curl.

Nora abruptly stopped her ministrations and sat astride Jim's toned legs and Jim slowly moved his hands in front of him, caressing the young woman's stomach, still without opening his eyes.

Nora leaned forward, and whispered "Good morning" against Jim's chest, right on top of his heart, feeling it beat under her pliant lips.

Circling Nora's navel softly, Jim murmured, "Good morning…"

Nora trailed a series of wet kisses up to Jim's collarbone and let out a soft moan when their lips met. "I could do that forever…" She whispered, with a happy hum.

For a few minutes they exchanged lazy, languid kisses as they caressed each other… before being interrupted by the train's loud whistle, twice.

She blinked in surprise. "Is the train going to leave?"

Finally opening his eyes, Jim shook his head. "No, not yet. That's the train conductor reporting that the Wanderer is ready to leave."

Suddenly Nora placed her hands on her grumbling belly. "I'm not hungry, I'm not hungry, no, not at all," she said. "please forgot you heard that." Then she licked Jim's neck.

She traced her lips over her lover's stubbled cheek to his ear, fingers playing with his hair which stood up in wild spikes on top of his head.

She was nibbling at Jim's earlobe when her stomach rumbled again.

Jim said, "I think it's time for you and me to enjoy one of Artemus's fantastic breakfasts… He makes delicious pancakes and waffles." And his own stomach growled loudly at the prospect.

Nora sighed in defeat. "Alright, breakfast," she said reluctantly.

He gently moved Nora to the side and kissed her nose in an apologetic gesture. "But first we're going to share a bath."

Cheerful and happy again, Nora asked, "Will you let me wash your hair like the last time? I love it."

Jim nodded. "Yes, I'd love that." Then he climbed out of the bed, stretching, noticing that the small bed was a mess with most of the bedspread and sheets thrown everywhere but on the mattress itself, a result of the previous night.

Their night had been very enthusiastic to the say the least, and had rendered them dead to the world when exhaustion had finally kicked in, late at night, he remembered and he linked an arm with the Brunette, tugging to get her on her feet. "Let's go Nora."

Nora swung his legs over the opposite side of the bed and stood. Cheerful and happy again she wrapped her arms around Jim's waist, leaning up to press a kiss to his lips. "Let's head toward the bathroom before it's occupied."

WWW

_Later_

_In Artemus's sleeping compartment_

Gabriella woke up as soft, warm light was peering through the gap between the curtains. She could hear outside Kansas City already bustling with its daily business.

She realized she was draped on top of Artie, her legs intertwined with Artemus's and her head was cushioned on his strong chest which was sprinkled with soft hair.

He was still sleeping, deeply, his chest rising and falling slowly as he breathed into the pillows, a smile curving his lips.

He was dreaming because she could see the slight movement under eyelids.

It was a happy dream obviously, she thought.

Lifting her head up, she kissed Artie's morning stubble scattered over his chin and jaw until he begrudgingly opened his eyes glazed over with sleep, his face relaxed.

She murmured 'Good morning' against her lover's forehead as she gave him a light kiss there. "It was the best sex I've ever had…" And she gave a contented sigh. "It was won-der-ful!"

Blushing at the compliment, Artie rubbed the remnants of slumber from his eyes and mumbled, "Morning… " and then he brushed a thumb over the young woman's cheek. "It was fantastic for me too Gabriella."

Gabriella nuzzled into the crook of her lover's neck, nibbling the warm skin all around his Adam's apple, then she licked his hairy jawline. "Yes it was, and a lot better than that," she added sprinkling Artemus's neck with kisses. She wrapped her naked body around Artie's, pressing her hips against his. "I want you to make love to me again," she said.

A soft sigh escaped Artie's lips. "You're insatiable…" as his hands traced soft patterns on Gabriella's bare back, her skin soft and warm against his fingertips. He trailed a fingertip up the young woman's spine, making her shudder in pleasure. "Did you have a good time?"

Gabriella grinned blissfully. "It was mind-blowing…" and pictured in her mind the exact moment they had collapsed on the bed from intense ecstasy and shivered. "Again? Five more minutes?" She asked, fluttering her eyelashes for emphasis.

Sighing, Artemus shook his head. "I'd love to make love to you, Gabriella, but I'm afraid you completely drained my energy." And suddenly his stomach growled it was empty. "Speaking of hunger…maybe we should get you something to eat." It must be about nine o'clock, he decided, judging by the angle of one ray of early morning sunlight that peeked through the half closed curtains, crossed the small room and illuminated the door. "It's time I go make something to eat."

Frustrated Gabriella pouted and pushed herself up from the side of the bed. She planted a small kiss on Artie's temple. "Okay." She glanced at the clock hung on the wall. "What? It's nine already? I thought it was much earlier than that!" She stood and added, "Breakfast, good idea! I'm going to have to eat it fast because I have a train leaving at 11. But I need to go back to the hotel and pack my things first." She sighed, not enthusiastic at the idea of travelling for three days to reach Washington. She kissed his frown. "I know you're disappointed, Artemus. I wish I could have stayed longer, you're a wonderful lover, last night was the best night of my entire life… but I have to leave, I don't have a choice, I don't want to lose my job." She grabbed Artie's shirt to cover herself. "I'm going to take a bath, and a rapid one."

It meant alone, Artie thought. He scowled in frustration. He wouldn't share her bath.

Gabriella met Jim in the narrow corridor. "Good morning, James," she said and walked toward the bathroom, stretching her arms.

Mesmerized, Jim watched the young woman wearing Artie's oversized shirt which reached the tops of her knees – and nothing else on top of her luscious curves - pad into the bathroom and softly shut the door behind her. "Good morning," he finally said once she had disappeared.

Marmalade padded inside, leaped on her owner's bed and lay down on her back, in a warm patch of sunlight. purring softly as Artemus rubbed her furry belly.

Frowning in concern Jim knocked at the open door and entered his best friend's sleeping compartment – finding Artie sitting on his bed, the top sheet and the bedspread pooled on his lap. His partner's shoulders were slumped and he looked sullen.

Knowing what was wrong, he sat down at the edge of the bed and said, "I don't like being alone either after spending a wonderful night in a woman's arms... but that's the way it is, Artie. It's never serious; and our romances are always short-lived. It comes with the job. They leave us or we leave them – and life goes on. There will be other cities, other women and other nights in lovely ladies' arms…" He smiled and wanting to change Artie's mood, he said, "I made breakfast."

Immediately alarms bells rang in Artie's head. "You what?"

Jim nodded. "You were still sleeping thirty minutes ago, and Nora and I were hungry, so I decided to prepare breakfast."

He lifted his nose and sniffed at the acrid smell of burning food which was floating, thick in the air, and he furrowed his brow. "And something's burning!" He stood, grabbed his short, tight, black underwear, put it on and then he rushed to the galley, finding scrambled eggs and onions turned into charcoal in a frying pan sitting on the stove.

He took a dishcloth, grabbed the handle of the smoking frying pan and lowered it into the sink, then he poured some water on it.

The he spotted a few pancakes in various states of being burned, on a plate, on the table.

Glaring at Jim he said, "Out of my galley! I'll let you know when breakfast is ready." And he pointed a finger at the door.

Smiling, Jim said, "Okay! Feel better?" as he left the small room filled with smoke, watching Artemus pull out the waffle iron from the dresser. "Mmm… waffles."

Glowering at his partner, Artie growled. "Out!"

Jim chuckled and padded toward the parlor suite, delighted to have accidentally distracted his best friend. But knew he wouldn't stay in a bad mood for long. His companion was naturally cheerful, and he would get to eat lots of waffles! He thought.

WWW

_Later_

_In the parlor suite_

Gabriella eagerly started breaking up the eggs and shoving pieces into her mouth. "Mmm… delicious," she mumbled her mouth full.

Nora nodded. "Yes, delicious. I've never had such a good omelet before."

Smiling, Artie said, "It's just a mushroom omelet with onions, chives and parsley," and he filled his mug with scorching hot coffee.

Gabriella was amazed. "I didn't know a man could cook like this… and love cooking. All the men I know - and I know many of them - can't boil an egg. James told me you could have been a Chef in a famous restaurant in France?"

Smiling with pride, Artemus bowed his head. "Yes. I'm a man of many talents."

The young blonde woman nodded. "I could see that – and feel that for hours... What you did to me with your tongue for example was awesome! And I particularly loved it when you were growling, like a wild beast while nipping and biting me!" And she chuckled when the older man started choking slightly, a red flush beginning to spread over his face with a clearly embarrassed look on his face and she sheepishly added, "I shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry."

Even Nora felt bad for Artemus. "Yes, far too much information," she said with a reprimanding expression on her face.

Gabriella took a sip of coffee from her mug and picked up a warm waffle from the ones stacked on a plate in front of her. They were golden, crispy and smelled amazing.

She licked her lips hungrily. "Mmm… waffles. I love waffles." She frowned, intrigued. "What's that white powder on it?" She asked, curious, and before Artemus could reply she touched it and licked the tip of her finger finding it sugary sweet.

Regaining his composure, Artie responded, "It's powdered sugar. I made it myself putting sugar in a coffee grinder, turning it into a powdered state."

Nora chose to pour hot chocolate spread on her pancake. "We're eating better here than in the best restaurant in town! Everything's soooo delicious, thank you."

Gabriella chuckled mockingly. "Nora, dear, you're drooling." And the brunette immediately wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, her cheeks flushing in embarrassment.

Pleased to hear this, Artie beamed. "You're welcome." Then he took a new sip of coffee watching Jim layering a pancake with marmalade. "If we could open a restaurant here, on the train, with me as Chef, we would quickly make a fortune."

Cutting a piece off from his thick crepe with his knife, Jim nodded. "But we can't. The Wanderer doesn't belong to us, but to the Government, but it's a good idea."

Gabriella nodded. "When you retire, think about it." and then she started shoveling pieces of waffles into her mouth. "God, I love waffles," she mumbled, her mouth full.

Nora shoved her first piece of chocolate-covered-pancake into her mouth and moaned in pleasure. "That's divine!" She said, licking her chocolatey lips.

Happy to hear that, Artie took a pancake, poured caramel sauce on it, and said, "Thank you Nora," watching the brunette slicing her pancake for another bite.

Placing a second fluffy waffle on her plate, Gabriella said, "I could eat waffles forever, but I just have time for another one." She broke a large chunk off the waffle and stuffed it into her mouth, chewing with eagerness. Then she said, "It's better with fingers," and licked them clean.

Smiling, Jim nodded. "I agree," and dropping his knife and fork, he took his marmalade-covered pancake and took a bite.

Artemus pulled a mouthful of caramelized pancake off the fork he was holding and asked," Does anyone want more coffee? There's still some left over. I can make another pot of it."

But Jim, Gabriella and Nora shook their heads. "No thanks," the brunette responded. "By the way the coffee is very good! the best I've ever had."

Artie gave the dark-haired woman a nod, a glint of pleasure in his brown eyes. "Thank you, Nora."

Gabriella wiped her face with her napkin before looking up at the two men. "Thanks for the breakfast, I have to leave now." She stood and moved toward Artemus; invading his personal space. She reached up to cup his scruffy face. "We'll see each other again, Artemus. You know where to find me in Washington," then she stood on her tiptoes and kissed the older man.

Smiling, Artie kissed her back, "Yes, I know, Gabriella."

Nora stood in her turn and moved in Jim's arms. He pressed her against his body. "I hope to see you again next time you come here," she said before gently giving him soft lingering kisses. Then she parted from Jim and moved beside Nora.

Closer to the door than his best friend, Artie opened the door leaf and said, "Good day ladies," then he bowed his head politely.

The two women gathered their hats and reticules and headed toward the rear platform of the Wanderer sending air-kisses to their lovers. "Bye!" they let out.

Then they left.

Once on the platform, walking side by side as if they were old friends they began to compare the merits of their respective lovers starting with their physical appearances.

WWW

Once alone, the two men sat at the deserted table, facing each other. The silence was suddenly broken by the train's whistle.

Pouring the rest of the coffee into his mug Jim said, "We can leave now." He grinned. "We have a two-week leave." Then he stood and pulled out the speaking tube from the side of the fake fireplace. "We're ready to go, Barkley. Whenever you want," he told the conductor, loudly. And the conductor's voice resounded, "Departing in one minute Mr. West!"

Artemus scratched his hairy chin while watching his partner put the communicating device back in its place. He needed a shave. "Santa Ana is close to the border. I'm sure people there eat a mix of American and Mexican breakfasts."

Sitting back on his stool Jim replied, "Sounds very good. Mmm… I can't wait to find out," with a smile full of innuendoes.

Shaking his head, Artie rolled his eyes. "There's plenty more fish in the sea, right, Jim? And you're good at fishing, right?"

Jim nodded. "Yes I am. And I love fish." Then he took a slice of toasted bread and put a thick layer of strawberry jam on it. "You could practice, you know, like making this breakfast first thing in the morning if you want..." He suggested. Then he took a large bite of toast.

Stretching like a cat, Artemus nodded. "Good idea." He stood. "I need more coffee," and he padded toward the stove.

Raising his hand, Jim took one of the sugared and cooling waffles and, licking his lips, poured some hot, liquid chocolate on it. "You know Artie, you should invent a potted chocolate spread… it would run less along the edges than liquid chocolate." Then he picked up a fork, used it to slice off a bite of chocolate-soaked waffle and guided it to his mouth.

Marmalade leaped from the couch where she had groomed herself for the last ten minutes and meowed she was hungry while slaloming between her owner's legs.

WWW

_A few days later_

_A few miles away from Santa Ana, Texas_

_On the beach_

Grilled fish.

Opening his eyes, Jim sniffed the air. Yes, it smelled like grilled fish.

He propped himself up on his elbows, turned to the right and then discovered Artie sitting cross-legged next to a fire.

His best friend, wearing his short black bathing suit was covered with sunburn. He winced in sympathy. Artie's creamy skin burnt before slowly tanning, slowly, he recalled. He remembered too that he was naked – and that his already tanned skin – everywhere – wouldn't burn.

He noticed small fish lined up on skewers resting on large pebbles placed on either side of the gentle, crackling flames made to flutter to the side by the salty breeze.

Sitting on the large blanket he had spread out on the golden sand, Jim said, "I see that fishing has been successful." Then he stretched his limbs. "You know Artie, you should put on a shirt... if you don't want your skin to burn even more. It must be painful."

Glancing down at his reddened forearms Artie nodded. "As you know, I love fishing and I'm good at it. While you were napping with Carlita in your arms, I went fishing by the rocks at the end of the beach and I'm cooking my catch for our dinner. As for my skin, I forgot to bring my protective sun cream. It's too bad, and yes, it's painful. But it's not complicated to make some, I just need a few ingredients like oil, beewax…I will go to Santa Ana tomorrow morning to gather what's necessary to make a whole pot of it."

Jim finally noticed that the young woman was gone – and instinctively looked around him. The beach which stretched out as far as you can see on each side, was punctuated here and there with clusters of rounded rocks, and behind the vast expanse of fine sand there were dunes and in the middle of the dunes, sat the fisherman's house.

No one. They were alone.

He noticed too that the ocean was calm, the waves lapping gently at the wet sand, that the sun was low on the horizon painting the immense sky in a gradation of orange, reds, and yellows. It would be dark in a few minutes and the first shining stars would appear. "She's gone!" he said.

Turning the skewers over the fire, Artemus said, "She was gone before I came back. She has to work at the cantina, remember?"

Remembering Carlita and him making love on the beach Jim smiled. "Yes, I remember. She'll come back here as soon as she finishes her night shift." His smile broadened and he added, "She'll bring a friend with her, she told me. Her name is Juanita, she's Mexican. She is very beautiful... but doesn't speak English, but it shouldn't be a problem for you, right?"

Grabbing a handful of twigs, Artemus threw them onto the fire. "I'm glad to hear that. I was thinking of spending two weeks here alone with you and fish and gulls as unique company - and I speak Spanish fluently." Then he beamed happily.

Jim stood and stretched his limbs. "I'm gonna go for a swim, call me when it's ready." And then he ran toward the water.

He dove headfirst into the waves and vanished under the water.

He came back ten minutes later, dripping wet, and grabbed the towel that Artie had brought for him from their house. "Thanks buddy," he said running a hand through his damp hair, mussed in places.

He quickly toweled himself dry and then wrapped it around his waist. He plopped down on the cooling sand moved beside Artie who had placed the grilled fish on two plates and took one. It had been gutted and filleted. He said, "Mmm… It looks delicious. I'm starving. Did you bring something to drink with it?"

Artie nodded and grabbed a wicker basket from behind his back. He removed the lids and then pulled out a bottle of liquor. He swallowed a piece of soft and melt-in-the-mouth fish and then said, "The ideal would have been a dry white wine with the grilled fish, but there was none at the Santa Ana grocery store. So I bought several bottles of tequila." He uncorked it and took a swig first. He grimaced and rasped, "Gaah! it would bring back a dead man to life!" He wiped his lips with the back of his hand and added, "I bought a few bottles of whiskey too and a lot of other things to last two weeks on our own."

Reaching out, Jim closed his fingers around the clear bottle and smiled. "Just what I need. It'll give me back my energy! Carlita has exhausted me."

He took a long sip and furrowed his brow, his eyes tearing. "Whoa! It's liquid fire!" He smiled broadly. "I love it!" He said and took a gulp.

He looked at the horizon. Stars in the sky illuminated the shoreline now, as well as the full moon. "The last time I made love under the stars and lit by the full moon was with Rachel Sullivan, in the field behind her house. It was last year, mid-summer."

Taking the bottle of tequila back Artie said in a reproving tone, "I know that. I had prepared a wonderful dinner for two that evening and you didn't show up at the train. I had to eat alone…" He swallowed a mouthful of alcohol and then added, "Well not exactly. I ate tête à tête with Marmalade and she loved everything from appetizer to dessert."

Pulling out a forgotten fishbone from a piece of fish Jim chuckled and replied, "As Marmie is a gourmet cat, I'm not surprised she ate all my part of the dinner."

Artie licked his fingers clean and then unpacked the picnic basket, pulling out a dish cloth which he spread on the sand, and on which he placed a terracotta plate filled with small fritters, a piece of black bread, two round goat cheeses, and two oranges. "It's a little frugal but good."

Seeing the Mexican treats – that he recognized, because Artie had already made this kind of donuts - Jim's eyes lit up and he licked his lips hungrily. He loved all kinds of donuts, he thought.

He took one and shoveled it into his mouth and moaned in delight. The buñuelo was crunchy outside, fluffy inside. It was Perfection!

The older man continued, "As we are close to the border, I made buñuelos. They are crunchy-on-the-outside and soft-on-the-inside… and coated with a sugar and cinnamon mixture."

Reaching out, Jim took the plate and said, "Thank you Artie." Then he stood and added, "See you later. I'm going to walk by the water to stretch my legs."

Sending Jim an upset frown, Artie replied, "You're taking the buñuelos with you. Didn't your mother teach you to share?"

Jim nodded. "Yes, she did. But I'm keeping them for me. It's bad for your waistline whereas I'm safe, and I need sugar to get my energy back. See you later."

The older man smiled. "Touché!"

The end


End file.
